Stress and Anxiety

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Stress and Anxiety and how it effects our Keto Lifestyle, or any lifestyle

I always like to recommend my 3 minute meditation to help you relax into a mindset of less thinking, therefore reducing your fearful sub conscious thoughts – to allow more joy, peace and happiness into your life, Less radio FM more Radio AM

Conflict

Many of us are afraid of conflict. We don’t like others to be angry with us or critical of us. We, therefore, avoid saying “no” when we are afraid that it will put us into conflict with someone else, whether that someone is an intimate partner, a colleague or friend, or a supervisor or boss. Many of us also try to avoid battles with our children, because we feel that if we say “no” to them, they will stop loving us.

Saying No

As children, we are taught not to go against authority. We are supposed to do what parents, teachers, and others in power tell us to do. We obey because of fears of being punished, but also because of a desire to please and be loved by these people who are very important to us. We carry this worry with us into adulthood.

The inability to say no is directly linked to the need to seek approval from others. But how do we end up the sort of adults who crave the positive opinions of others? Often it stems from a childhood where we didn’t feel we could get love simply by being ourselves.

People Pleasing can lead to Stress and Anxiety, Depression, (SAD) always being in tension and therefore needing coping mechanisms.

Remember, when you say no to others and things you don’t want, you are saying yes to something better – yourself.

Are you a people pleaser?

I know so many of us are. We want to see everyone around us happy and do our best to make this happen. This can mean anything from being kind, to offering favours, to lending a helping hand, or simply just being there, being supportive.
There’s no better feeling than giving love to others. It makes us feel alive to share in a loving spirit with those around us. It creates feelings of happiness, gratitude and affection when we see the ones we care about content.
That’s a wonderful thing. Human connections and sharing love are two of the most essential experiences we can have in life.

But so often we are so busy giving love to others, we forget to give love to ourselves.
We hate the idea of denying people the things they want of us, but we don’t think twice when it comes to being honest about our wants and desires and rejecting them in some way.
By not loving ourselves enough, or at all, we are actually self-sabotaging our lives. We aren’t giving ourselves the permission to live fully, live proudly, and live our Aliveness.

Love matters. It might be the thing that matters most. But we must remember to start with loving ourselves first. We have to love ourselves enough to say no when necessary, to make time for the things that bring us joy, and to live the life we choose.
That certainly doesn’t mean being selfish, self-centred, and self-absorbed. Not at all. What it does suggest is being self-aware and doing self-check-ins.

“Love yourself not in some egocentric, self-serving sense but love yourself the way you would love your friend in the sense of taking care of yourself, nourishing yourself, trying to understand, comfort and strengthen yourself.”

We must practice being kind and patient with ourselves so we can have that same feeling with others.

Putting it simply: giving love to ourselves first can help us give more love to others. But in doing that, don’t forget to start with the most important person of all—yourself.

Stress and Anxiety – Fear that you make up in your sub-conscious mind.

Thought is NOT reality, yet it is through thought that our realities are created. Thought is merely a vehicle, it is what you put into that vehicle that shapes your experience.

We must realise the simple act of listening to our needs and wants, and acknowledging them in an authentic manner, can better help us be that way with the people around us.

WHEN THE NERVOUS SYSTEM REJOICES

The most beautiful quality of all in a human being, in my humble opinion?

  • The ability to listen deeply.
  • To listen from Presence. From stillness.
  • To listen without trying to fix someone, or change them, or ‘save’ them.
  • The ability to allow another to be exactly as they are.
  • Not giving unsolicited advice and premature answers.
  • Just listening. Listening with an open mind and an open heart and a receptive nervous system.

Allowing them to breathe, to express, to weep, to question, to doubt, to be completely unique, to expand into the space, to discover their own truth, to walk their own messy path, to make their own unique mistakes.

It is a rare gift – the ability to allow others to be exactly as they are. Broken. Whole. Sad. Angry. Afraid. Lost. Awake or asleep. Whatever.

    • To listen to them with every fibre of your being.
    • To receive them through the senses
    • To swaddle them in undistracted, fascinated attention.
    • To envelop them in a silent, warm Presence.
    • To make them feel – in those precious moments that you are together

When you sense this kind of listening from someone, it’s unmistakable
It cannot be manufactured. It cannot be faked. It is utterly rare and wholesome. Your nervous system senses it and rejoices.
It is nothing less than unconditional love.

Accept – Then act.
Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. Make it your friend and ally, not your enemy. This will transform your whole life.

Self-care Process: –
1. Block or Mute the Toxic people in our lives. (Not Me) “A quiet Mind”
2. Learn to say NO. (Next Option)
3. Doing what you love. A good Feeling
4. Be yourself, surround yourself with the people who will help you grow and accept you. (Authentic True Nature) Not Broken – Not Lacking – You are enough – You are Love – You are loved

As I began to love myself, I found that anguish and emotional suffering
are only warning signs that I was living against my own truth.
Today, I know, this is “AUTHENTICITY”.
As I began to love myself, I understood how much it can offend somebody
As I try to force my desires on this person, even though I knew the time
was not right and the person was not ready for it, and even though this
person was me. Today I call it “RESPECT”.
As I began to love myself, I stopped craving for a different life,
and I could see that everything that surrounded me was inviting me to grow.
Today I call it “MATURITY”.
As I began to love myself, I understood that at any circumstance,
I am in the right place at the right time, and everything happens
at the exactly right moment. So, I could be calm.
Today I call it “SELF-CONFIDENCE”.
As I began to love myself, I quit stealing my own time,
and I stopped designing huge projects for the future.
Today, I only do what brings me joy and happiness, things I love to do
and that make my heart cheer, and I do them in my own way and in
my own rhythm. Today I call it “SIMPLICITY”.
As I began to love myself, I freed myself of anything that is no good for
my health – food, people, things, situations, and everything that drew
me down and away from myself. At first, I called this audacity
Today I know it is “LOVE OF ONESELF”.
As I began to love myself, I quit trying to always be right, and ever since
I was wrong less of the time. Today I discovered that is “MODESTY”.
As I began to love myself, I refused to go on living in the past and worry
about the future. Now, I only live for the moment, where EVERYTHING
is happening. Today I live each day, day by day, and I call it “FULFILLMENT”.
As I began to love myself, I recognised that my mind can disturb me
and it can make me sick. But as I connected it to my heart, my
mind became a valuable ally. Today I call this
connection “WISDOM OF THE HEART”. Common Sense
We no longer need to fear arguments, confrontations or any kind of problems
with ourselves or others. Even stars collide, and out of their crashing
new worlds are born. Today I know THAT IS “LIFE”

“Decide what kind of life you want to have and say NO to Anxiety and Stress”

Response – Able

Unconsciously Incompetent – Dream – you don’t know what you don’t know

Consciously Incompetent – Reality – You do know what you don’t know

Consciously Competent – Growth (new learning) – You do know what you do know

Unconsciously Competent – Habit You don’t realise what you do know and there is more to learn so go back to start in new and fresh areas.

You are not Scarred for life, You are not Scared for life Drop the S for Supressed emotions. Drop an R Drop the Regret of the past.

You are left with Cared for life and add self to that… and build on that to get to Love of Self

You are not scared for life you are Sacred for life – Scars are not Signs of weakness, they are signs of survival and endurance.

“Trauma is not what happens to you. Trauma is what happens inside you, as a result of what happens to you.”
Unhealed trauma impacts every aspect of our lives. It shapes the way we live, the way we love and the way we make sense of the world. It is the root of our deepest wounds…
From addiction to troubles with intimacy all the way to emotional, spiritual and physical health. There is a Wisdom that resides in your trauma,

What if?…
There was a world where compassion, empathy and understanding are stronger forces than competition, disconnection, overconsumption… and the mental and emotional disharmony that occurs because of these forces of society.

“Letting go isn’t giving up. It’s understanding that the best is yet to come.”
You are not meant to bear that which you find unpleasant; you are meant to change it.”
Thriving is the goal for every form and expression of life.
“If you know what you want, if you’ve made up your mind, if you can see it, feel it and move toward it in some way every single day, it has to happen. ”
The only way to get what you really want is to know what you really want.
And the only way to know what you really want is to know yourself.
And the only way to know yourself, is to be yourself. And the only way to be yourself is to listen to your heart and go with the good feeling.

Questions
1. What would you do to move forward if you didn’t have to feel bad about it, no matter how things worked out – Get out of jail free card?
2. What would you attempt if you knew you couldn’t fail?
3. What really needs to be in place for you to have an authentic life of Happiness Peace contentment Euphoria or just the Joy of being alive?

“How easily we accept that something can change us and how difficult it is for us to accept that we can change something”
Wisdom is not learned it is unfolded from within one’s own Consciousness

As always, stay safe

 

Ian xx

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